I have been amazed over and over at how God truly weaves our lives together through seemingly non-significant events and out of nowhere shows up on the scene just to prove that it was all for a divine purpose. I am just one who notices details, so in turn, I almost always note the way in which His fingerprints blanket the path that lead to his plan. I am a bit crazy, I'll admit that, but nonetheless, He does love to display His splendor! This week has been and continues to be just one of those goose pimply weeks...
If you are not already aware, I am an adoption counselor for a christian agency here in NC. I work with moms who are considering placing their unborn children for adoption. The road that led me to this job is an amazing story in itself, and that is for another day. I was born for this...I love my job. It is a new adventure and I get to minister to hurting people all the time and get this, they find me. How cool is that?
These past few weeks I have been working with several moms. One, an escort right here in town who has been married,robbed and pregnant several times. She grew up in the foster care system and married an abusive man at 16 just to emancipate herself..out of shear desperation. Another, a mom of four, soon to be six (twins) who was living in a battered women's shelter hiding from the father of two of her children. She has recently been evicted from her small trailer and totalled her only source of transportation. We will call her "L", because she is the mom I would love for you pray for as I am about to share some of her story. I share this because sometimes we see the world of adoption as so neat and warm and fuzzy, but the harsh reality is that it mostly starts with pain and loss. "L" contacted me initially because she wanted to place the babies she was carrying. She was raising four children alone already and was staying with her dad in a tiny (I only saw one bedroom) house in a VERY impoverished crime laden area of town. As time progressed, she began to inquire about placing one of her older children, "J". "J" is 3.5 years old and the only child from a particular father who has more than ten children already. For some reason "L" did not think she was being a very good parent to "J" and she admitted she was afraid she might hurt him. We began to discuss plans for her to place him later this week.
She contacted me while I happened to be in her town (1hour away) for an appointment and she asked could I take him within the hour. Okay, I am no dummy, but there is not exactly a text book for "How to remove a child from his mother when he is old enough to know what is going on". I admit, I almost freaked. I prayed as quickly as I was speaking to her. Within the hour "L" and little "J" were in the car and we were signing her rights away as his mother. She had told him a little about what was going on (can you imagine?) and allowed his siblings to tell him goodbye. My heart was breaking for her and for this little guy. The whole time I was thinking, this is exactly what our little Stephen will feel in a few weeks when strange white people come and smile at him and give him things and then take him away from everything he has ever known. Just like in the book of Romans, what the enemy meant for evil, God will turn it around for good..that's the good news.
I must mention that my middle daughter was with me during this whole adventure. I am not sure she will ever be the same. She kept trying to make little "J" smile, but the look of terror on his face was not leaving for some time. I noticed she kept checking out "L", almost like she wanted to really understand her. In total, we were there three hours and I don't remember my nine year old girl uttering a word..
We fed mom and child and drove her home. She got out of the car and turned on her heel. Looked at the babe and simply stated "Remember what we talked about? You are going with her now". I hugged her and told her everything would be just fine (would it?) and she went into the house.
Over the next several hours, we stopped by our home to drop off Landon. "J" began to slowly talk and enjoyed sifting through some of Stephen's things to wear (perfect fit. coincidence?nope!) He was quite proud of brand new Spider Man underwear and pj's. Wilson was a complete doll face with him. He was so tender and tried to give him every toy in the house. This is one of his most endearing qualities...such a tender hearted little man. Proof that he will be an excellent big brother. Soon, we were on the road again to transport little "J" to my dear friend who is a foster parent for the agency. Austyn came along for the ride this time.
For most of the two hour ride, I prayed for little "J". I prayed for his life, his future. I spoke the words from Jeremiah over him as he slept.."J-, God has big plans for you. He plans to make your life prosperous. He promises to give you a hope and a future. All of this is not intended to bring you harm, it is so that you can go on to be the man that God called you to be."
We reached our final meeting point and transferred the sleeping prince to his chariot.
He was on his way to a bright future..it was just really dark right then.
As we pulled onto the highway, Austyn, who had awakened from the transfer, burst into tears.
Through her sobs she cried "Mom, it isn't fair. He doesn't know what is happening to him. He may never see his mom again..". She gets it, she totally gets it and it broke her heart.
Wonder how many of us skip through life, worrying about what car to drive, how much money to put into an IRA and what we will wear to so-n-so's wedding, and yet never even pray for the millions of little "J"s.
It has been four days since these events unfolded and I just got off the phone with my "boo"
("J"). He exclaimed "I dot new shoes and some new sots, too". He is settling in quite nicely and seems genuinely content. He has made some new friends and quite an impression on those around him. There are several folks that would take him in heart beat. He has a family already..a brand new mom and a brand new dad that are delighted and very eager to come take him home. I keep having visions of him running through the front door some years from now saying.."Mom! I got an A on my science test!!"....
Yes, He knows the plans he has for you "J", plans not to harm you, but to give you a hope and a future.
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